Poor Man’s Garfield
As it’s come up in conversation several times in the past week, I thought it might be time to go over the lyrics of the Heathcliff theme song once and for all. Heathcliff, if you remember, is the poor man’s Garfield, a scrappy orange cat that runs around eating from the garbage and hanging out with his weird friends.
Heathcliff, Heathcliff no one should terrify their neighborhood.
But Heathcliff just won’t be undone playing pranks on everyone.
There’s a race to be on top the competition doesn’t stop.Mixing it with the ladies man being charming debonair.
The gang will rein supreme and no one can deny.
They’ll make some history and always have an alibi.
So join in the jubilee the cats are great, they’ll all agree.
You’ll find in each calamity the cat’s superiority.Huh, ah oh, oh ah oh, ah uh. Huh oh ah, ah oh, oh ah oh uh uh.
Heathcliff, Heathcliff no one should terrify the neighborhood.
But Heathcliff just won’t be undone you should realize he can win it with you!
Now if you watched this cartoon as a kid, let me ask you: Did you hear these lyrics in the song? I didn’t. I thought the last line was “You can winter and he can winter with you!” This is fun to do when you’re out with friends. For extra credit, after the jump are the opening credits of the show.
Lemondrop of the Week
This week, I discuss how I moved from Chicago to New York with Kumail because his career required him to be here, and how that doesn’t make me any less of a feminist. Go read it! Hooray!
Facebook: Fixed.
FYI- This was the question I received that was so Facebooky that I slid it over to the Laurens at Fix My Facebook. Their answer should be up soooooooon!
How do I handle a really passive aggressive Facebook friend? I have this friend that I see fairly often because she’s in my circle, but we’re not super close or anything. She constantly posts status updates and tweets that seem to be aimed at me directly, stuff like “well I guess some people get drunk faster than others” the morning after I get drunk with everyone, or “Ugh, some people need to shut up” after I post a few updates in a row. If I say anything to her about it, I know she’s going to say that I’m being egotistical by assuming they’re about me, but I KNOW they’re about me. What do I do?
Three words: Steampunk. Haunted. House.
If you live in New York and will be around October 28th through the 31st, you must go to this.
It’s the Steampunk Haunted House, and here’s how they’re describing it.
Ask Gynomite, kinda!
Lauren Lapkus and Lauren Ashley Smith run this awesome site called Fix My Facebook where they address Facebook dilemmas. I thought this was pretty brilliant, so I decided to slide them one of my more Facebooky questions, and they slid me one of their more Gynomitey questions. Kinda like Freaky Friday, but instead with blogs.
I work in radio, and while I’m not really “big” enough for a work profile, a few listeners have added my personal profile. No big whoop, so I thought, it’s not like I have anything to hide. Just might have to cut back on the expletives.
Unfortunately, there’s one listener who is way too talkative on my status updates (and way too political for my tastes). It’s gotten to the point where my friends are starting to bait him into getting into arguments. Last night, I acknowledged an on-air screw-up I made, and when some friends started joshin’ me, he comes in like he’s riding on a white horse to protect me! I had to tell him to back off.
I don’t want to block the guy; he’s a hardcore listener. But I’m honestly afraid he’s gonna piss someone off.
That’s Numberwang!
Please enjoy this- it’s a Numberwang sketch from That Mitchell and Webb Look, the British sketch series made by the guys who star in Peep Show. It’s maybe one of the most brilliant sketches I’ve seen in a long time. You can and should get the show on Netflix.
Happiness
There was a great article in the New York Post by Mandy Stadtmiller yesterday about some recent research on happiness. No one really talks much about the concept of happiness until someone publishes a study about just how little of it we have. This study was especially difficult to swallow, because it showed that women’s happiness has been in a steady decline for the last 35 years, whereas men’s happiness has been increasing.
How rom-coms ruined dating
This piece, adapted from a workshop I’ve done, is up over at Lemondrop! Boom!
McSweeney’s!
Coworker, buddy, and comedian Dan Wilbur got his first McSweeney’s post today!!! I’ll give you a taste, but you must go read it now!
Bob Dylan GPS Voice Quotes
“How many roads must a man drive down, before you can say you have reached your destination?”
“Weather information: It’s a hard, it’s a hard, it’s a hard, it’s a hard, it’s a hard rain’s a-gonna fall.”
Shout Me Out
I recently became friends with the newlywed couple of Sam and Massoumeh, and they are both lovely and charming and funny and have regular taco nights. The cherry on top is that Sam created and hosts this monthly show called the Radio Happy Hour at Le Poisson Rouge that is like nothing I’ve seen in New York. It’s an old timey radio play and variety show that gets huge guests each month.
Last month the guests were Tunde Adebimpe from TV on the Radio and my very own Kumail Nanjiani. The show was hilarious and awesome, and I got to be in the room when Tunde sang two songs a capella, just him and a vocal looper.
Jump to see video of “Shout Me Out”. You will not regret it. That man’s got some pipes.
