This is a thing that exists.
In the Raleigh/Durham airport waiting to fly back to LA, I spotted this at a magazine stand:
Double Lives
Sorry Gynomite’s been out of commission for a few days, I have been in Florida MCing a Muslim wedding for Kumail’s cousin, and then in North Carolina soaking up some rays at my extended family’s annual vacation. Come on in if you want to see a few pictures, there will be more later, for sure. My suitcase, stuffed with formal beaded Pakistani clothes and bikinis, has never been so confused.
Stuff You Should Read Today!
Here’s the story of Jonah Hill’s massive arm scar, which I’ve never noticed before (I’ve been distracted by all that neckbeard).
This week’s Guyspeak/Girlspeak at Lemondrop, where a guy and I debate what to do when you fall in love with a friend.
Here’s the leaked Dr. Dre/Jay-Z collaboration that Dre seems to be apologizing for, even though it’s awesome and samples fucking Kraftwerk! Trans-Europe Express! For real! Go listen!
I reminisce over my favorite vacation episodes of sitcoms throughout the years over at TV.com, go check it out and see if you have any to add.
Here's why drugs are bad kids. The addict is on the right.
Weirdness: Jeremy London, who has a history of substance abuse issues, claims he was kidnapped at gunpoint by two men who forced him to buy alcohol and smoke crack. Sounds like every addict’s fantasy… but they did arrest a guy for it. I wonder what Jason London thinks of all this?
Old school home ec classes were way more intense! Read all about it!
New Game: Bieber or Lesbian?
I’ve been waiting for this to happen.
Cops in Ocean City Maryland responded to an anonymous tip that 16 year old Justin Bieber was inside local bar Mugs and Mallets, drinking like a little superstar. They responded and found…
The Top Ten Questions I’d Ask Christina Aguilera
10. How did it feel at the VMAs years ago when Madonna kissed Britney and then the camera cut to Justin Timberlake’s reaction instead of bothering to record you kissing Madonna?
9. Why on earth do you keep oversexualizing yourself and pretending like you’re a pioneer in this field? Get in line behind Madonna, Britney, yourself circa 2007, Katy Perry, Gaga, and even that child Miley Cyrus. We know this trick. Show us a new one.
For once, I’m rooting for the attorneys.
I don’t want to brag, but I’ve been boycotting Perez Hilton’s site since he called one of the Black Eyed Peas a faggot and then tried to say that it was the most hurtful word he could think of. I love celeb gossip, but I just couldn’t keep giving this megalomaniac miserable rejected drama club kid my valuable clicks. So I don’t. I am a happier person now.
All this money and I'm still hideous and unlikeable!
Apparently on Sunday Perez Tweeted a pic of Miley Cyrus getting out of a car and flashing her ladybits. Now, Miley is certainly playing the hack “Who me, sexy? I’m just a little girl having fun!” card that Britney played well before her, and so Hannah Montana most likely took off her panties and got out of a car like a dinosaur in order to garner some press, but she’s a dumb 17 year old. Perez is a dumb “adult” who should have known better.
There’s a ton of scorn being heaped upon him now, with people calling on him to be arrested for distributing child porn. Salon interviewed a lawyer who specializes in child porn, and he said
All it will take is an enterprising attorney interested in making an example out of him; he could be prosecuted on the state or federal level — or both — with a conviction potentially resulting in a 15-year sentence and lifetime registration as a sex offender. Douglas says that “if he’s not prosecuted, there is one reason why: his name is Perez Hilton.
C’mon lawyers, go get em!
Et tu, Jamiroquai?
Big hat money is not falling out of the sky, people. He’s got to get out there and earn it.
From NY Mag.
That’s What She Said
What we have here is Alfred Hitchcock doing a screen test with an actress for the movie Blackmail and illustrating the first recorded instance of the “That’s what she said” joke. That’s cool and all, but I was more fascinated to watch a young, hirsute Hitchcock on screen with that awesome creepy old man’s voice. Watch!
From everywhere, but I found it at HuffPo.
This Week’s Gynomite in Other Places
TV shows I like to watch when I’m sick, my thoughts on the newest reality show Work of Art, and the weekly Guyspeak/Girlspeak, this time about sending someone naked pics of yourself. Also over at Tokyopop you can read some strips from the manga I adapted, Neko Ramen!
And now, a Human Centipede tattoo!
Ladies, isn’t it nice when guys tip you off that they are douchebags with their permanent accessory choices?
