Islam: Approaching Christian-like Levels of Nuttiness

March 31, 2011 at 2:58 pm (Uncategorized)

In a sign of religious equality that warms the cockles of my heart, a woman found Allah in her potato.

Seriously. This is how we’re going to achieve love and tolerance in this world. We may worship different Gods, but we all find those Gods in fruits and vegetables.

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Vacation Reading List.

March 29, 2011 at 3:47 pm (book)

Sweet Valley Confidential by Francine Pascal (IT CAME IN THE MAIL JUST NOW!!!)

The Morning After: Sex, Fear, and Feminism by Katie Roiphe

I might have some identity issues.

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A plea to the Sweet Valley people- LET ME MAKE THE TWINS’ PLAYLISTS!

March 29, 2011 at 10:22 am (book)

If you and I are Facebook friends, then you know that I am mega excited for the release of Sweet Valley Confidential, which tracks Elizabeth and Jessica Wakefield 10 years after high school, in a world where they are not speaking to each other. EEEEEE!  (If you do not know anything about the Sweet Valley universe, I am not explaining it to you and it is pointless to continue reading this post.) My copy is on its way now, and I cannot wait to be re-immerssed in the cheesy, smug, repetitive, and weirdly dorky world of Sweet Valley.

Today is the official release day, and because I am signed up for the newsletter, I got directed to “Sweet Valley Fun“, which gives you hints on how to throw a Sweet Valley party of your own! I HOPE THE DROIDS CAN PLAY THERE!

The page has cocktail recipes, a quiz to see if you’d make it in Jessica’s bitchfest of a sorority, a dating chart, fun facts “Did you know that Ken Matthews was blind for a while?!?!”, and my favorite part, playlists for Jessica and Elizabeth.

I could not WAIT to read the playlists, because I just knew that Jessica would be into the socially acceptable weirdness of Lady Gaga, whereas Elizabeth would probably like some horrible band like Train and maybe that one Radiohead song that’s on the radio, but I was shocked to find that neither twin appears to like a song past 1994. Seriously.

Jessica has songs like Maneater by Hall and Oates, Right Stuff by New Kids on the Block, and Manic Monday (which is by The Bangles, not Cyndi Lauper, guys), and I think Robyn’s Show Me Love is the most recent song on the list.

Elizabeth loves Eurythmics (Sweet Dreams) and Paula Abdul (Forever Your Girl), but she seems a bit more plugged into the pulse of 15 years ago with TLC’s Waterfalls and the Gin Blossoms on her playlist.

This is just such a bummer, but that’s when I realized that I had the power of imagination all along! So Sweet Valley staff, if you contact me and just say the word “YES”, I will make you the two most personality-reflective playlists ever created for fictional twins in the history of the world. I promise. I’ll make Jessica into Lady MIA and also Katy Perry, and Elizabeth will delve into some Arcade Fire maybe.

Just put me in coach. I’m ready to play.


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Hell needs an enema.

March 29, 2011 at 9:09 am (music, videos of my life)

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Gynomite’s Reading Room!

March 28, 2011 at 4:13 pm (gynomite's reading room, Uncategorized)

A great event in NYC and LA for Huffington Post Divorce about “The Moment I Knew”. Go if you can!

The latest installment of Googy, where Kumail sets up a Show & Tell for everyone!

The shirtwaist style has a lot of history in America, and I wrote about it for MyDaily! Read!

Obama has a magical tent called a SCIF that looks like a blue tarp but actually keeps out light, sound, and prevents anyone from hearing anything going on inside. Read all about it!

Also, I reviewed my six favorite workout DVDs for MyDaily!

I’m going to be traveling a bit in the next couple of weeks, so there will be limited Gynomite, but you will be in my hearts. In the meantime, if you’re in LA, go to Nerdist Theater at Meltdown, where I serve as Program Director.

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The mail can’t move fast enough for me.

March 27, 2011 at 6:28 pm (book)

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Yeah guys, because you know who needs some work in the face? Zooey Deschanel.

March 27, 2011 at 10:02 am (pop culture)

Here’s a new Rimmel ad for lipstick featuring their newest spokesmodel, Zooey Deschanel, the girl who all girls with bangs aspire to look like.

Does she look a little off to you? Not sure? Ok, let’s try a side-by-side comparison… Read the rest of this entry »

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This is a protective face mask from WWI

March 27, 2011 at 9:46 am (Uncategorized)

Good luck trying to sleep tonight! From TYWKIWDBI!

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“I am more angry with you than you are with me”

March 27, 2011 at 9:43 am (women's issues)

Veena Malik is a Pakistani actress that appeared on the Indian version of Big Brother, and she returned to be trounced in the press by Islamic clerics who said that she shamed her country. She was not happy about this, as she believes herself to be a good Muslim, and her response to the cleric is one of the most impassioned and well-stated retorts I’ve ever seen.

I know it’s 7 minutes, but it’s beyond worth it.

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Gynomite’s Reading Room!

March 25, 2011 at 9:53 am (gynomite's reading room, Uncategorized)

Rural American families have been undergoing huge changes over the past few decades, including a rising divorce rate. Says one divorced Iowa woman- “As we get more education we get more confidence and more income,” Ms. Vermeer said, “women are saying, ‘Look, she finally had the guts to stand up and walk out.’ ” Pretty inspiring stuff.

The death knoll of hipsterism: Yelp has officially added “hipster” as a type of ambiance you can search for when looking for a bar. Hipster joins romantic, dive-y, classy, and trendy as a destination of mind, body, and soul.

This blew my mind- the secret messages in 12 company logos. You’ll never be able to unsee!

Cupcake wars! The owners of Magnolia Bakery are all suing each other, and I write punny things about it for MyDaily!

You can actually buy a Dita Von Teese cardigan… sorry, let me correct myself: You can actually buy ME a Dita Von Teese cardigan! Do it!

More fun posts from me at Nerdist!

How baby carrots became (are becoming?) the newest junk food!

Gabe from Videogum’s scorching open letter to Good Morning America in reference to the Chris Brown situation. Everyone should read this, because good lord I’ve had enough of shitty domestically violent celebrities shitheads.

We are talking about a convicted domestic abuser continuing a pattern of ACTUAL FUCKING VIOLENCE, and not only do you pretend like this is not some kind of problem by refusing to file a police report, but you indulge and encourage it by publicly stating (PUBLICLY STATING) that everyone on the show “wishes him the absolute best.” EVERYONE ON THE SHOW WISHES HIM THE ABSOLUTE BEST? A) WHY? B) FUCK YOU.

This is an amazing collection at Urlesque, of course from Hillary Buckholtz, of those tissue-thin mail order forms for books that we used to get in elementary school. They filled me with so much hope and excitement EVERY SINGLE TIME, as did actually getting to the book fair and getting my stack of books. I wish this still existed. Big ups to Christine, my pal since 3rd grade, for sending this to me this morning!

And after the jump, the new prequel teaser from Season 6 of Dr. Who. Excitement doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel about it….

Read the rest of this entry »

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