The Marilyn Facebook meme- what’s wrong with it? I picked this because when I initially read it, I thought it had good points about our glamorization of Marilyn Monroe, who was really a pretty fucked up lady, but now that I look at it again, I’m struck by how nitpicky it is. If we start trashing the Facebook memes girls I went to middle school with repost endlessly, we’ll never stop.
New Indoor Kids episode up today, with Jordan Morris joining Kumail and I to debate the age-old topic of what makes a person a gamer?
Ali Waller wrote this for Jezebel, and it is hilarious as shit. So funny that I’m surprised it was on Jezebel.
Stephen King has written a 25 page essay on gun control. You can buy it for Kindle.
This brought me so much joy- 16 embarrassing celebrity photo shoots. My favorite pic is this ridiculous one of Jennifer Aniston.
Do you have £200, some extra jeans, and a desire to look like Ellie May Clampett?
Well then, allow me to introduce you to Pantaloonies, the brainchild of Helena Bonham Carter.
That’s right, in addition to being an actress and general lovable weirdo, Helena Bonham Carter and her best friend will also reconfigure your jeans to add ruffles to them.
How do they know how to customize them appropriately for you?
From their site:
The pair work by offering a service by which people send away for a little questionnaire, asking about their favourite films and whether or not they would like a ‘bum-frill’, fill in the answers and then send it back along with the jeans they wish to be customised. The end result is a cute pair of uniquely customised jeans.
Get info on how to get your own Pantaloonies here, and be patient: it apparently takes at least six weeks.
What if this is me? Slightly genuine but mostly jokingly concerned. Otherkin. (Also, cue conservative shitheads using this as an argument that if we allow trans people to exist, this is the next step.)
Rookie asked my wonderful Kumail to answer some questions from girls. He rocked it.
The Meltdown with Jonah and Kumail is shooting a pilot of our show for Comedy Central, and if you live in LA, you can be there! Check out the details here!
Gay is the new black. Years ago when I was in grad school, I would have to drive 1 1/2 to 2 hours a day from home to school to internship, and I would listen to our local hip hop station, where they would just be crazy homophobic in between playing songs. The Bible arguments that these DJs were using to justify their homophobia were the same Bible arguments folk were using to justify slavery. This is what I would yell at my car radio every day. For two years.
Obama should totally resign over the Beyonce lip-synching scandal. Totally.
Ask Amy Poehler answers a question about the importance of sleep, and it’s genius.
Welcome back to another edition of Celebrity Gossip Translator, where I attempt to explain the top five most read stories on People.com, for those of you that lack the time to do the research on what’s really going on with the people we’ve decided are worthy of our attention.
This week is a weird one.
In her former life, Emily “Gynomite” Gordon was a couples and family therapist licensed in 2 1/2 states. In this life, she’s a freelance fighter of your emotional woes with Ask Gynomite. Write her at firstname.lastname@example.org- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on catastrophizing, and once again, she does it by talking into a camera.
I have always had this problem but I never could correctly describe it until recently. I think I have a problem with”catastrophizing.” I am unsure if it is a scientific term but its on wikipedia. I constantly assume the worst possible outcome will happen. It’s why I am terrified of getting on a plane and why I worry constantly.
An example is when I hang out with this girl I would rather waste gas and drive her home (she doesnt live very close to me) than meet a halfway point because when she drives home I freak out about the prospect of a drunk driver hitting her or some other type of accident that could severely injure her or worse. I do this with most of my family members too if I know theyre driving and I can’t contact them.
I also do it with my myself. If i text someone, even a close friend, and they take a while to get back i am 100% positive (and at least as far as I know almost always 100% wrong after the fact) that this is because they don’t want to hang out with me anymore for whatever reason. I also will go to great lengths to conceal this or even give off the impression that I feel the opposite in most situations. It’s just how my mind works I suppose. I was just wondering if you had any advice on how to quell these seemingly meaningless worries, thanks a lot.
They’re now casting Girls: The reality show. Yup. How can you get your life together when you can’t even get a seat on the L train, and other horrible things people have written down!
New episode of The Indoor Kids- this week, it’s Matt Mira and Blair Butler joining us to mourn the passing of G4 as a gamer network!
Relatedly, this piece in The Guardian is the best thing I’ve read about the link between violence and video games. Guess what: having a rough upbringing is much more predictive of violence than anything else. So can we start “cracking down” on rough upbringings?
My friend Megan is a genius- please enjoy the fake ad for birth control yogurt she created.
I contributed to this list of video game futures that never came true- for Gameological! Mine was Bad Dudes.
Really really really really solid advice on how you work at keeping your long term relationship healthy and happy from Psychology Today. Seriously. It involves work. It’s important. Read this. It’s great.
To promote the new game Dead Island Riptide, the dudes who made it thought it might be a fun idea to include a bloody severed woman’s torso in a bikini in the Collector’s Edition. This is either them being colossally stupid, or it’s a genius PR move meant to backfire. As an Indoor Kid listener pointed out on our Facebook page, “I didn’t even know there was a new Dead Island game, and now I do.”
A nice collection of emotional states that don’t have English language equivalents.
Cheaters in Japan can’t seem to embrace new technology, especially when Fujitsu’s 3 year old model hides their affairs. Once you designate one of your contacts as “secret”, this phone will hide their calls and texts from the phone- you only know a secret person has contacted you because the battery gauge will look slightly different. Genius and horrifying. Don’t worry, America, there’s a $5 app in America that hides text and calls from people you put on a list.
I loved the Delias catalog as a preteen and teen- and this was when you had to call in and speak to a person to make an order. The clothes were low quality, every item fit wildly differently, and yes, there were a ton of drawstring items. I still have one Delias item from my youth- a hot pink motorcycle jacket. It’s just insane enough for me to keep forever.
It was so much fun last time, let’s do it again! First, let’s get the business out of the way:
I frequently find myself in bars explaining celebrity gossip to friends of mine who are “too busy” masturbating to Twitter to know anything about pop culture. It’s a great arrangement, because it allows my friends to find out about celebrity gossip while maintaining that they don’t care about celebrity gossip, and it allows me to talk about stuff that I enjoy. So I thought I’d do that here.
A caveat: what I won’t do is justify giving a shit about celebrity gossip. It’s a fucking hobby, it’s not the most important thing to me, but part of the reason I became a therapist is because I like juicy interpersonal relations, and frankly, my friends aren’t really bringing much to the table in that regard. I wouldn’t want them to- friends who are constantly having drama are exhausting to be around. So please don’t come at me with “Why do you care what _____ is doing?!” comments, because why do you care what I care about? Shut up.
Now that we’ve done all that, let’s have some fun going through the most popular articles at people.com and explaining them in layman’s terms to you fine people with better things to do.
In her former life, Emily “Gynomite” Gordon was a couples and family therapist licensed in 2 1/2 states. In this life, she’s a freelance fighter of your emotional woes with Ask Gynomite. Write her at email@example.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on distrust in a relationship when there’s no real cause for it.
I’m in a relationship and I am always concerned that my boyfriend is going to cheat on me. He’s always been great, I have no reason to suspect him of cheating, and I’ve not really been cheated on before (other than in middle school, which I don’t think counts), but for some reason I am constantly suspicious of him. The end result is that I freak out on him for no reason. I’m writing you now because we recently had a huge fight because he lied to me about having (a totally work-related) lunch with two female coworkers because he thought I would freak out, and when it came out anyway, I did freak out because he lied to me, even though I understand why he did. What can I do?
I answered this question by talking into a camera because I felt too lazy to type, so jump and enjoy!
Do you have a spare $10 lying around?
If you do, you should use it to buy the Two Disc Special Edition of Purple Rain.
Sure, you get the movie, which is amazing, but you get soooo much more than that.
Quick side story- I worked at a home for schizophrenics for a while. Our 270 residents were mostly in their 40s and African American, and institutionalized since early adulthood, which meant that the 80s were their cultural reference points. This made us all great friends. They absolutely loved Purple Rain, and you haven’t really lived until a room full of adults with schizophrenia starts doing the “Dearly beloved” speech from Let’s Go Crazy in unison.
If… nay, WHEN you buy this item, you will get
- the movie
- commentary from the director, producer, and cinematographer, who are all still completely in love with the project and know how special it was
- an inside look at First Avenue, the club in Minneapolis that housed Prince as well as Morris Day and The Time
- lots of concert footage intermixed with people talking about how badass Prince was
- a documentary about the making of the movie, where you learn such tidbits like the fact that Prince wrote When Doves Cry because the movie needed a song for a montage.
- a ton of videos
- and the crown jewel of the whole thing- the MTV premiere party of Purple Rain, where I collected these two images:
Before you ask, no, Prince has absolutely no involvement in the special features. And yet, it’s still amazing. Please invest today.