“In fact your whole torso has a freeform quality to it…”

February 20, 2010 at 11:52 am (pop culture) (, , , , )

I knew something inherently bothered me about this picture of Julieanne Moore being used for a handbag ad, but I thought it was just how stupid it was that someone would use birds to sell handbags. (“One on her hand and one on the bag!  That’ll get ‘em talkin!”)

Then Photoshop Disasters clarified my distaste:

So Julianne Moore has her kit off for Bulgari. Good for you Julianne! Now twist to the right so we can see some of your lovely back. Yay. But let’s also have your right shoulder waaay out in front. In fact your whole torso has a freeform quality to it, but at least your legs have been retouched with almost photographic realism.

Thanks guys, you always help my eyes and brain communicate better.

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Power, Proctor, and Gamble

October 11, 2009 at 4:21 pm (my life, tales from the therapist's chair) (, , , )

After the jump is a piece I wrote about having power as a kid that didn’t seem to fit anywhere but here at Gynomite.  So here it is.  In it you will learn the slogan that I came up with for Pert Plus as a seven year old.

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And this is for….hair products?

September 21, 2008 at 10:11 am (pop culture) (, , , )

I saw this series of ads in Cosmo the other day- they’re for Paul Mitchell hair styling products, and they star Paul Mitchell and his creepy creepy family.  He’s an older, balding gent with an older wife with a wild mane of blonde hair, and a young son that a) looks like a kid from Home Improvement, and b) is certainly going to get beaten up every day.

The only picture I could find of the creepiest ad is another girl taking a picture of the ad, so thanks Lovemeloveme, for your picture!

really?  shirtless, with a snake, and THAT hair?

really? shirtless, with a snake, and THAT hair?

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And speaking of weird brands trying to make themselves relevant again…..

August 15, 2008 at 12:15 pm (pop culture) (, , )

Here comes Wrangler jeans’ new ad campaign.  Their last one,  Wrangler!  We’re the ones that get you made fun of in middle school! , did not work as well as they expected.  So in a move that will surprise few, they went for shock value.  Take a look!

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Just when you thought you were being original

August 15, 2008 at 12:06 pm (pop culture) (, , , , , )

pbr

Salon has a really interesting article about Pabst Beer and its slow and steady ascension to become the hipster beer in the last few years, something I noticed in North Carolina (where “pabst rock” was a genre of music in Chapel Hill), and in Chicago, where that and Dixie beer were all my bike messenger friends would drink.

Here, read some!

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