Ask Gynomite!
Gynomite is a licensed therapist in 2 1/2 states and she would love to take a crack at your emotional dilemmas. Write her at askgynomite@gmail.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on men who hate PDA.
I’ve been dating a guy for a few months, and everything is going really well, except that he refuses to show me any affection in public. At first I was fine with it, but it’s starting to bug me more and more. The most he’ll “allow” is me resting my head on his shoulder during a movie, but there’s no hand holding, no drunken makeouts at bars, no squeezing my knee at parties, nothing. Everything else is going really well, but this has become a weird sore spot between the two of us, and sometimes I’ll attempt a kiss in public even though I know it’ll start weirdness between us. I just want to kiss him! Help!
Ahhh, this is definitely a proceed with caution situation, but one that can be easily solved.
Ask Gynomite!
Gynomite is a licensed therapist in 2 1/2 states and she would love to take a crack at your emotional dilemmas. Write her at askgynomite@gmail.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on figuring out where you stand with a man.
I’ve been seeing someone casually for a few months now, but I’m not sure where we stand. I like him, and I want to ask him where he sees this going, but I’m also concerned about putting too much pressure on him too soon. I’m also not sure if he’s seeing other people (or at least wants to keep that option open for now). I have been out with a few other people, but I don’t want that to blow up in my face if I learn he thinks we’ve reached a certain level of commitment already. I don’t actually really care if we keep it casual for now, but I just want to make sure we’re on the same page… without scaring him!
The last time I tried to have this talk with someone, he freaked out and ran away kicking and screaming, so I’m just trying to avoid making the same mistakes.
Oi…this is a question as old as the hills, and a good one at that.
Ask Gynomite!
Gynomite is a licensed therapist in 2 1/2 states and she would love to take a crack at your emotional dilemmas. Write her at askgynomite@gmail.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on being someone’s parent/lover.
My girlfriend and I have been together for about a year, and I love her. We get along great, but I feel like I’m kinda running her life at this point. She never remembers to pay her bills, or take lunch with her, or do laundry, and I end up doing all this stuff for her. Not paying for her bills, just literally opening her mail and getting stuff organized. And she sometimes gets too drunk when we’re out together and I have to get her home safe. We don’t live together but I think she wants to move in together soon. I love her but I don’t think this is fair to me. What do I do?
Oh my, you are in a pickle. In my previous life in North Carolina, I worked with mainly children and their parents, and I became pretty well-versed in parenting skills. So let me impart some of them onto you now, because you have effectively become this girl’s daddy.
Ask Gynomite!
Gynomite is a licensed therapist in 2 1/2 states and she would love to take a crack at your emotional dilemmas. Write her at askgynomite@gmail.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on boyfriends of BFF’s that hit on you.
Last night I was out with a few friends, including my best friend and her boyfriend of 5 or 6 months. I have a boyfriend but he wasn’t out with us. I went outside for a cigarette with my best friend’s boyfriend at some point in the night and he told me that he was attracted to me and wished that we were both single so we could hook up. I kinda laughed it off, but he seemed pretty serious about it. Do I tell my BFF?
In a word, yes.
Ask Gynomite!
Gynomite is a licensed therapist in 2 1/2 states and she would love to take a crack at your emotional dilemmas. Write her at askgynomite@gmail.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on forgiving a cheater.
I recently found out that my boyfriend of 2 years cheated on me. It happened a little while ago, and he is incredibly contrite about it and wants us to stay together. We have our ups and downs, but I always thought our relationship was good and I just feel so lost. I love him so much and am so hurt. I want to stay with him, but part of me also wants to punch him in the face and never see him again. Should you forgive a cheater?
Ask Gynomite!
Gynomite is a licensed therapist in 2 1/2 states and she would love to take a crack at your emotional dilemmas. Write her at askgynomite@gmail.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on knowing when to stay and when to go in a relationship.
This is kind of a huge question, but I’ve been with my boyfriend for about 4 years and I just don’t think it’s working out. I care about him, but I’m just so tired of not getting along and I’m bored and I want to start over. Nothing huge is going on, it’s just …..a slow decline of our relationship. How do you know when you should be working on a relationship versus when it’s time to just get out?
Ask Gynomite!
Gynomite is a licensed therapist in 2 1/2 states and she would love to take a crack at your emotional dilemmas. Write her at askgynomite@gmail.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on that creepy little feeling you get when you think there’s something wrong in your relationship.
I’ve been in a good long term relationship with my guy for just over a year. Lately something between us just seems off. He’s distant, he’s irritable, and we don’t have any fun anymore. I’ve asked him what’s going on and he says everything is fine. I think that’s a lie. What can I do?
I like to think of relationships between people as actual things that are separate from each of the two people involved. So there’s you, there’s your boyfriend, and there’s your relationship. It’s a thing you two have created. So the first thing to do when you get a feeling that something is just wrong is to see if you can isolate who is actually affected.
Ask Gynomite!
Gynomite is a licensed therapist in 2 1/2 states and would love to take a crack at your emotional dilemmas. Write her at askgynomite@gmail.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on the terrifying prospect of hanging out with children.
Gynomite, I have to hang out with a 8 year old boy in a few days and I have no idea what to do. It’s my cousin’s kid and my cousin and I were best friends growing up, so now that I’m visiting home, my cousin thought it might be good for me to spend some time with her son. I am freaking out. I’m not great with kids and only met this one once, when he was a baby. I know nothing about him except that he likes Ben 10.
Hanging out with children can be really scary, especially if you’re not used to it, so I feel your pain. I worked as a therapist for children for a bit, and the hardest part of the job was the weird rapport you have to try and develop with a person who has the capacity to think and speak and feel emotions, and yet, is a full 20 to 30 years younger than you.
Ask Gynomite!
Gynomite is a licensed therapist in 2 1/2 states and would love to take a crack at your emotional dilemmas. Write her at askgynomite@gmail.com- all emails stay confidential. Today, Gynomite takes on cyberstalking.
About three months ago I broke up with the guy I’d been dating for just under a year. Things are fine now, we’re cordial with each other, and we’ve both dated other people since then. Last week I went to his Facebook profile once and since then, I’m hooked. I check it and refresh it constantly, and there’s lots of stuff to obsess over on it. I thought I was over him, but I cannot stop checking his profile. Does this mean I’m not over him?
