I Love You, Ma’am

August 22, 2010 at 6:57 pm (movies, relationships, Uncategorized, women's issues) (, , , )

Have I got a movie pitch for you!  It’s about female friendships, it’s called “I Love You, Ma’am, and it’s directly taken and altered from the “I Love You Man” wiki.  Why can’t this be a movie?  Watching multi-dimensional women try to figure out how to be friends with each other interests me a whole lot more than watching bromance after bromance.

Peter Klaven Laurie Nicholson, a real estate agent, just got engaged to Zooey Rice Seth Dartan. Zooey Seth is ecstatic resolved about the engagement and calls her his friends to tell them about it, but Peter Laurie does not seem to have anyone special he’d she’d like to share the good news with. While visiting his her parents, it comes out that Peter Laurie is more adept at getting along with women men, instead of having any male friends a real video game-loving guy’s girl. After overhearing Zooey’s Seth’s friends voice their concerns over the matter, Peter Laurie realizes he she needs to find male female friends in order to have a best man maid of honor for his her wedding.

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Worst CGI in History!

June 8, 2010 at 10:02 am (movies) (, , )

CHUD is doing a great 20 day review of the Worst CGI in History.  They’re on Day 9, but I suggest you keep up with it every day, because it’s yielding a lot of gems.  Like this!

From Mortal Kombat Annihilation

Jump for more!

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Remember how funny it was when Steve Carrell shouted “Kelly Clarkson” in 40 Year Old Virgin?

April 11, 2010 at 3:05 pm (movies) (, , )

You know who else thought it was funny?  The people who made the sure-to-be-horrible movie Furry Vengeance, starring Brendan Fraser as (take it away Wikipedia!) “a real estate developer who faces off with a group of angry animals, led by a raccoon, when one of his housing developments encroaches too far into the animal’s wilderness”.

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Flip you, flip ya for real: a Benecio Del Toro post

February 24, 2010 at 3:48 pm (movies) (, , , )

Benecio Del Toro as the Dog-Faced Boy in Big Top Pee Wee

Benecio Del Toro as the Wolfman in The Wolfman

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Hausu

January 20, 2010 at 9:37 pm (movies) (, , )

I cannot even begin to explain to you how awesome the movie Hausu is.  It was made in 1977 and is, if you want to simplify things, a movie about a girl who invites her friends to come and stay with her at her aunt’s house, an aunt she has not seen in 10 years.  Then shit goes down.  The story was based on an idea that the director’s 7 year old daughter had, and that’s only the tip of the insanity iceberg.

Not only does it have all the hallmarks of a late 70s movie- weird too loud soundtrack, oversaturated colors, fade outs to transition from scene to scene, but it also has bizarro editing and truly creepy effects and an unsettling fascination with girl nudity.  Plus the musical numbers.  Oh man, SO GREAT!!  Jared suggested it, and for that, my hat is off to him.  It’s playing at the IFC here in New York, and if you live here, I cannot recommend it enough.  Jump to see one of my favorite scenes from it.

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Check out what your neighbors are renting.

January 10, 2010 at 10:51 pm (movies) (, , , , )

This is so cool.

This is an interactive map of 10 major metropolitan areas showing what the most popular and least popular Netflix rentals are by zip code.  In our zip code, it’s

  1. Milk
  2. The Wrestler
  3. Burn After Reading
  4. Rachel Getting Married
  5. Twilight
  6. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
  7. Doubt
  8. Slumdog Millionaire
  9. Role Models
  10. Pineapple Express

It’s amazing to watch the patterns change as you move across neighborhoods, especially if you know those areas yourself.  Seriously, do yourself a favor and lose part of your Monday exploring this.

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Joe and Noah’s Movie Spoilers: Avatar

January 4, 2010 at 10:50 am (movies) (, , , , )

This movie will spoil the movie Avatar for you, but it will also warm your heart to the indelible charms of Joe Mande and Noah Garfinkel.

Seriously, they explain the whole movie.  You’re warned.

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Just in time for Christmas, it’s two articles scathing the hell out of Avatar.

December 25, 2009 at 10:35 am (movies) (, , )

Let me start this post by saying that I actually enjoyed Avatar quite a bit.  It’s dumb and kinda hack, but it’s also a lot of fun and looks gorgeous.  It’s like the golden retriever of movies.  But I thought both of these articles were incredibly well-written criticisms the many many problems with the movie, like how its characters are ridiculously shallow, or how it’s basically a white man’s race fantasy.  And like this problem:

They are effing blue cat people.

Click to read on, it’s interesting stuff.  (Spoilers ahead)

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The Creeping Terror

December 14, 2009 at 4:57 pm (movies) (, , )

I would like to introduce you to one of the worst movies of all time:  The Creeping Terror.

The story behind the movie is way more interesting than the plot, which is described thusly by Wikipedia:

A newlywed deputy, Martin Gordon (Vic Savage), encounters an alien spacecraft that has crash landed in California. A large, sluglike, omnivorous monster emerges from the side of an impacted spaceship. A second one, still tethered inside, kills a forest ranger and the sheriff (Byrd Holland) when they independently enter the craft to investigate.

Martin, now temporary sheriff, joins his wife Brett; Dr. Bradford, a renowned scientist; and Col. James Caldwell, a military commander and his men to fight the creature. Meanwhile the monster stalks the countryside, devouring a girl in a bikini, picnickers at a hootenanny, Grandpa Brown and his grandson while fishing, a housewife hanging the laundry, the patrons at the “community dance hall”, and couples in their cars at “lovers’ lane”.

The protagonists ultimately deduce that the monsters are not intelligent. They are mindless biological-sample eaters. The bio-analysis data is microwaved back to the probe’s home planet through the spaceship.

Now click to read the story behind the movie.

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Oh, rather than having a sense of humor, you’re an artist.

December 4, 2009 at 10:22 am (movies, pop culture, television) (, , , , , )

So you guys remember when James Franco joined the cast of General Hospital?

The blogosphere was abuzz in speculating why James Franco, fairly well respected actor and hunk, would be on a soap opera.  I decided that he just has an awesome sense of humor and was cool enough to try different weird things, and I applauded him for it.

Turns out I was wrong.

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