Someone give Paula and her siblings a reality show.

February 8, 2011 at 7:45 am (pop culture) (, )

This video encapsulates everything that is wrong with the Kim Kardashians of the world.

In it, Prince, during one of his amazing Madison Square Garden concerts, is taking the time to have fun with some of the audience members by having women pulled onstage one at a time to dance with him. At the beginning of the video, we see Paula, an audience member rocking awesome hair and butt-dancing with Prince. “Get off the stage!” he yells eventually, “You’re too sexy!”

Then, starting at about :50, Kim Kardashian is pulled onstage, and she reacts the way all the popular girls in high school used to when they were made the center of attention in a move they didn’t orchestrate: she chokes.

She chokes hard.

She brushes her hair out of her face, she shakes her head no, and she just fucking stands there as Prince is dancing around her. Sometimes she laughs a little, embarrassed, and playfully pushes Prince as if to say “You silly, stop it, I can’t be fun with this creepy plastic sexy-without-being-sexual image I’m created for myself! I might mess up the makeup that has been carefully airbrushed onto my face!”

After a long and painful 30 seconds, Prince kicks Kim (who looks just gorgeous) off the stage, yelling “Get off the stage… welcome to America.”

How sad and embarrassing when our queen of tabloid celebutards can’t even let herself go and do the one thing that, arguably, would be the most pure expression of joy on the planet- dancing with Prince.

Let’s go ahead and get started on Paula’s reality show on E!, shall we?

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That smile still destroys me.

December 9, 2010 at 3:54 pm (music) (, )

Please, please, please, watch Prince doing a surprise appearance on The View this morning.

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Ridiculous Dance Face: Still plaguing me.

August 8, 2010 at 11:48 am (dance) (, , )

I’ve been struggling with this problem for years, and it caught up with me again last night, when Prince’s “I Would Die 4 U” came on at Matt Braunger’s birthday party.  Dan really sold it though.

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This is what it sounds like when doves rehearse

March 8, 2010 at 1:12 pm (music) (, , )

Carlos sent me this treasure trove of videos of Prince and the Revolution rehearsing way back in 1984, in what looks like a garage.  Enjoy all of them at The Daily Swarm, but right here, right now, we’re going to get down to When Doves Cry.  As Carlos pointed out, the best moment is 6:40 when Prince can’t help but dance a little to his own jams.  Also, there’s a bonus piece at the end of this video that might be Baby I’m a Star.  SQUEEE!!

Enjoy!

Also, hurry and watch before they’re all taken down!

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If you wanted to buy a Sam Cooke album, where would you go?

February 15, 2010 at 5:03 pm (movies, music) (, , )

This is my favorite scene from the atrocity that is Under the Cherry Moon.

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A scene from the movie that should be made about my time as a therapist in a home for 270 schizophrenics

November 11, 2009 at 9:32 am (tales from the therapist's chair) (, , , )

Interior, Dingy Office of a Psychiatric Facility where two harried therapists are doing about a million things at once.

The scene:   About five residents are milling around the office with our heroine, chatting and laughing and asking for money.  Our heroine has been slowly realizing that most of the residents here have not been fully functioning members of society since Reagan was president, so most of their cultural touchstones are in the 80s.  One resident, Luke, is obsessed with Prince and Morris Day, and has recently discovered that our heroine is as well.  He has memorized all of Purple Rain.

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Spitting on the hand that literally made her entire career

October 26, 2009 at 11:33 am (music) (, , , , )

This song is great, huh?  Most people know that Prince wrote it, I’m not bending any minds with that factoid.  But I was wondering today how those two ever collaborated, as they seem like they live in different universes.  So I looked it up, and holy shit do they have history.  Click to read it.

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And now, five awesome songs written by Prince that were made famous by other people

June 15, 2009 at 6:58 am (music) (, )

Prince has a ton of amazing songs.  I mean, duh.  Did you know he also wrote a ton of really popular songs for other people?  For instance, this one:

Sinead O’Connor- Nothing Compares 2 U

But really, that’s an easy guess, what with the number and letter “u” in the song title.  Did you know about these?

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NEW PRINCE VIDEO!!!!!!!!

April 24, 2009 at 9:51 am (music) (, )

This is Prince covering Crimson and Clover and just generally being the coolest guy on earth.  That’s all.

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Celebrity gossip roundup

June 14, 2008 at 8:24 am (pop culture) (, , , )

As it is Saturday, I will be spending the day playing video games before running out to see Vampire Weekend at Central Park, then seeing Team Submarine at Sketchfest, then watching Kumail do a show, and then watching Thomas in Baby Wants Candy.  All of these things are amazing things to do today if you happen to have time free and enjoy fun.

But I had to mention a few things- remember when Brad Pitt was photographed with a tattoo on his back, and it was reported that he actually got a tattoo of the levee system map in New Orleans?

Well, that was bullshit.  Angelina Jolie just told that tale in Entertainment Weekly:

EW- What’s the deal with Brad’s new tattoo?

AJ- I drew that.  We went to Davos…one night we didn’t have anything to do, so I was drawing on his back.

EW- So it’s not permanent?

AJ- It is.  But I was sketching.

EW- And you thought, “let’s make a tattoo!”?

AJ- He just liked it!  The picture everybody saw was kind of awkward, but it just lines up beautifully on his back, just enhances the part of the body I like.

!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can’t decide how to feel about that, other than gleeful.  It’s either incredibly egotistical, or incredibly sweet and romantic.

In other news from Entertainment Weekly, Prince celebrated his 50th birthday this week by walking down Hollywood Blvd without security.  Really Prince, is that a present for you, or for us?

To wrap all this up, and speaking of the purple one, this is my favorite footage of Prince EVER, but I couldn’t figure out how to imbed it!  It’s his first performance on American Bandstand, and while the songs are great, the interview starting at 4:22 is absolutely mesmerizing.   Christian Siriano learned everything he ever thought he knew from this clip alone.

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